The do's and don'ts of getting divorced
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DO think about tax consequences. For instance, if a stock is valued at $3,000, it may only be worth $2,600 in cash after capital gains taxes are paid. Thus, it would not be the same as receiving $3,000 cash in a divorce settlement. "If couples are trying to provide each with similar amounts of spendable money, they must consider the costs of converting certain assets into cash before deciding how to divide items," cautions Margorie Engel, author, president and CEO of Stepfamily Association of America.

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DO choose your assets carefully. When staking a claim in assets, remember that choosing the wrong assets may end up costing you money, instead of making you money. If you want to keep the house, for instance, first educate yourself about the fair market value of your home, says Goldstein. Remember that you'll have to make the mortgage payments and pay taxes, interest, insurance, utilities and maintenance extras. Selling it won't be a picnic, either: The brokerage costs and taxes from the sale will be solely your responsibility.

DO line up your own emotional support. Choose friends you can trust, because you never know who may end up turning on you or even testifying against you later. Consulting with a counselor can keep you thinking clearly in order to focus on your divorce plan. If you anticipate a child custody fight, you may want to take your child to a therapist before it starts. Randy Rolfe, author of "The Seven Secrets of Successful Parents," states that when you have counseling, you'll be less likely to give up and give over things in the divorce.

Experts also recommend that you remain practical -- legally and emotionally -- when planning your divorce. There some things you should never do:

• Don't skimp on legal help.
• Don't just move out of your home. Unless you fear physical harm, talk to your lawyer before you make your move.
• Don't try to do it all. Some cases do need experts like accountants, appraisers, etc. Thinking you can do these things on your own can be counterproductive.
• Don't share a lawyer with your spouse. This scenario presents a huge conflict of interest. Most lawyers won't do it, and it could borderline on malpractice.
• Don't make revenge the goal of the divorce.
• Don't compare your divorce to another divorce. Each case has its own set of facts, with its own personality.
• Don't bad-mouth your spouse to your children. It can backfire on you in ways you don't expect.
• Don't just think about your actions, but also consider the impact they can have in a case. For example, don't write a letter you would mind being read in a courtroom.

A divorce will affect you legally, financially and emotionally. Although deciding to divorce isn't easy, taking the time to incorporate these do's and don'ts can make the process -- and its financial and emotional consequences -- as uncomplicated as possible.

Bankrate editorial assistant Leslie Hunt contributed to this story.