smart spending

Could you be an online-dating gold digger?

All well and good, but for some daters, all those exciting interests and life experiences are lost in translation somewhere between their fingers and the Internet -- which is to say, they write ineffective profiles.

Oren's advice is to ditch the touchy-feely talk about emotions and instead, be very specific about who you are while using action-oriented phrases.

Make a list

She suggests an easy exercise to get your profile rolling. Start by making a list of your best qualities.

"I wrote, 'good sense of humor, sarcastic New York sensibility but not cynical, optimistic, a good friend and affectionate,'" she says. "It could be anything: 'great taste in clothes, I only need three hours of sleep per night,' anything."

Next, find examples of those qualities in action.

"Not in terms of feelings but in terms of what you're actually doing," says Oren.

She gives some examples: "planning a bicycle trip, writing a book and redecorating my living room."

Now, combine the qualities with the activities. "Describe yourself actively," says Oren.

"I'm a good friend and a good listener and right now I have a friend going out of town and I'm dog-sitting for her poodle," she cites as an example.

Consider the format

According to Whitney Casey, relationship expert with Match.com and author of "The Man Plan: Drive Men Wild ... Not Away," the way the profile is formatted can be key as well.

Whitney recommends that women use bullet points to keep men's focus.

"If you give them a list of who you are they can relate to, that's better than a paragraph full of thoughts and ramblings," she says.

Then again, if a high level of literacy is something you prize in a man, you may want to stick with paragraphs.

Whitney emphasizes that keeping it simple and straightforward is the way to score a second look: your career, your hobbies and a couple of your current activities.

Activities can provide a hook for interested prospects to grab onto in the initial e-mail exchange.

"Oh you're running the marathon? So am I. Want to train together?" Casey says.

Pointers for men

For men, Whitney recommends writing complete paragraphs -- three paragraphs, comprised of three sentences each.

"Women don't want to see bullet points, lists or one sentence you wrote about yourself. It shows that you don't have any insight and you're not willing to put any time into it," she says.

Start broadly by writing about yourself and your career. Move on to activities and hobbies in the second paragraph and finish up by writing about what you're doing now and what you're looking for in a woman.

Even if your dream date has the head of Benjamin Franklin and a distinctive green hue, leave a little bit to the imagination. No one wants to date a gold digger, but who wouldn't want to date someone whose ambition, intelligence and success match their own?

Begin with clarity about who you are and who you're looking for, and you may be surprised by who shows up.

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