smart spending

A cheat sheet on tipping do's and don'ts

Special events
Special events © MNStudio/

Special events

With all that happens at major events like weddings and funerals, giving gratuities might be easily overlooked. Farley, the manners expert, offered these recommendations.

Wedding tips guide:

  • Wait staff: $20 to $25 per server.
  • Bartender: $20 to $25 per bartender or 10 percent of the total bar tab.
  • Coat room/bathroom attendants: $1 per guest, paid by the host.
  • Disc jockey: $50 to $100.
  • Presiding official: Some prefer a donation to their house of worship and others have a suggested honorarium.
  • Altar boys: $10 to $15.
  • Wedding planner: $50 to $100. If it's for the planning firm's owner, don't tip.

Funeral tips guideline:

  • Presiding official: $50 to $300 if an honorarium is not preset.

"Any tips for funeral home staff are handled by the funeral home," Farley says. "Sometimes those fees are itemized on the bill (as a gratuity), or they can be included in the overall price that the family pays."


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