How to land talk show tickets

Dottie Haines of Los Angeles, has seen The Tonight Show With Jay Leno in person for most of the last five years. You could say that Dottie is a regular -- she typically catches a bus to NBC studios in Burbank, Calif., and sits in the audience close to Jay's bandleader, Kevin Eubanks. To Tonight Show fans, she has become a cult figure. For example, sailors from the U.S.S. Indianapolis write to her all the time.

"I get so much mail, they started joking about giving me my own ZIP code," says Haines.

Haines' supporters are not limited to sailors; Leno himself has developed affection for her. After seeing Haines wait in the free ticket line for three years while sitting in her wheelchair, Leno insisted that she have access to any show she wants without standing outside. So the security guards will open the doors especially for her (although Haines sometimes prefers to wait in line with the other fans).

But if you want tickets to see Leno, David Letterman, Oprah or any talk show host, don't expect to have as much privilege as Dottie. Although tickets are free, each show has its own special rules. And if you want to be successful, make sure you follow them closer than Mike Tyson at a beauty pageant. Otherwise, your request will be as rejected as Newt Gingrich on Capitol Hill.

The early bird gets the worm

For The Tonight Show, Haines offers fans the following tips:

*Write in your request a couple of months in advance to: 3000 W. Alameda, Burbank, CA 91523, Attention: Tonight Show tickets. NBC will mail the tickets to your home.

Your request should include a self-addressed stamped envelope with a specific date or a specific group of dates that you want to see the show, adds Kevin Marousek, an NBC Tonight Show page. Marousek says that if you write "any date" it will be tossed out, so make sure you specify a preference.

*For people in California trying to get in stand-by, Haines says the line starts forming outside guest relations around 6:00 or 6:30 a.m. (Yawn!) The ticket office opens around 8:00 a.m. There is a two-ticket-per-person limit. For the really big guests like Garth Brooks, the line will start growing the day before, and people will camp out for the seats.

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Also, you must be at least 16 years old to get in the door. But don't tell this to Hanson fans.

"We get every screaming teenager's mom saying that their kid is the biggest Hanson fan ever and deserves to get in," laments Marousek. "We also get people who call and say, 'I hate you. I'll never watch that show again. But, can I get tickets?' Safe to say, those folks don't get in."

Top 10 reasons to see David Letterman

So your home office in Topeka, Kan., is dying to get tickets to see the Late Show with David Letterman at the Ed Sullivan Theatre in New York. Well folks, let's hope they have plenty of patience and time on their hands. The waiting period for tickets to see Dave and his friends Paul, Surjibar and Mujibal, is longer than a full-term pregnancy.

Yours truly e-mailed a request for tickets on the Late Show online Web site nearly a year ago. Last week, I received a post card saying that my complimentary seats are ready to be claimed. I called the number listed on the notice and was informed that they take reservations six weeks at a time. Since I do not have a vacation until next April, I asked for a delay. They told me that would be fine. Just call back when I'm ready to go freeze my nuts off in the notoriously chilly studio. Who knows? Maybe I'll win a Big Ass Ham!

Letterman's infamous standby line has gone the way of interest rates on savings accounts -- invisible. CBS now puts its waiting room tickets up for grabs over the phone at 11:00 a.m. the day of the show. If you feel lucky and you are near the Manhattan studio, you can call (212) 247-6497 to get your shot at tickets.

"Reserved" tickets to see our favorite gapped-toothed comedian can either be ordered online (like I did) or by sending a request to: Late Show Tickets, The Ed Sullivan Theatre, 1697 Broadway New York, N.Y. 10019. Again there is a two-ticket limit. Also, the reserve term is loose because as the tickets clearly state, there is no guarantee of admittance. So make sure to arrive at the box office for the taping no later than 4:15 p.m.

The most important show ... ever!

If you are looking for tickets to Comedy Central's The Daily Show, there's a three-month waiting list according to Peter Shane, The Daily Show assistant audience coordinator in New York. There has been a demand lately for seats to see the show, especially since host Craig Kilborn is leaving December 17 to take over for Tom Snyder on CBS' Late Late Show. Also, reporters A. Whitney Brown and Brian Unger are quitting the show as well. New Daily Show host Jon Stewart (of MTV fame) will take over the reigns on January 11, 1999. The Daily Show will air a one-hour year-end special Sunday December 13, and after Kilborn leaves, it's wall-to-wall repeats until Stewart sits in the big chair, according to Joel Lyons, Comedy Central spokesman in New York.

If you would like tickets to see The Daily Show, call (212) 586-2477. Shane points out that they put up cancellation seats to upcoming shows over the phone line on Fridays between 10:30-11:30 a.m. So there is still hope to see Kilborn ask his hilarious "5 Questions" before he flies the coop -- such as the infamous, "So, does the carpet match the curtains?" You must be at least 18 and have a reachable phone number in the tri-state area (New York, New Jersey and Connecticut -- hint: use relatives and friends if you live out-of-state).

On the next Oprah Winfrey show ...

Fans of The Oprah Winfrey Show can see Oprah in person by calling (312) 591-9222 Monday through Friday 9:00 a.m. to 5:00 p.m. central time. The talk show queen takes reservations to see her Chicago-based taping for the current and next month only. Apparently, this is the only way to get tickets to see Oprah. Her official Web page says that you must have a reservation to attend and that tickets are not available by mail or e-mail. Also, walk-ins are not allowed.

You must be at least 16 to attend the show. A parent must accompany anyone under 18, with the child's birth certificate in hand. Also, If you are planning a vacation to see Oprah in the summer months, don't bother. The show does not tape in the summer, and the reservations department takes a hiatus until early August.

Jeff Sammon, NBC ticket office page in New York, says that Rosie O'Donnell Show fans can only request to be entered into a lottery for tickets in the months of April, May and June. You must mail in a postcard with your name, address and phone number to: NBC Studios, The Rosie O'Donnell Show, 30 Rockefeller Plaza, Suite 800E, New York, N.Y. 10112. Standbys can try their luck at 8:30 a.m. the day of the show. Show representatives hand out numbers to eager fans and spin a big wheel to see who gets in at the last minute. Like Oprah, the show is in rerun mode during the summer.

So just how many people are dying to get tickets to see O'Donnell?

"I have seven post office cardboard boxes full of ticket requests," Sammon says.

Meanwhile, a popular show with the college crowd is NBC's Late Night With Conan O'Brien. Sammon suggests Conan crazies phone in their ticket demands to (212) 664-3057 at least a month in advance. The standby line starts outside the 49^th Street entrance of New York's 30 Rockefeller Center at 9:00 a.m. Unlike Rosie, the show tapes year-round.

Sammon warns that NBC keeps computer records of show requests, and that you send in only one request for one show. If you get greedy, the computer will kick you out of the system harder than Jackie Chan.

How to be politically correct in getting tixs

The Web site for Politically Incorrect With Bill Maher offers tickets by e-mail or over the phone. Just click on their Web page and fill in the blanks for number of seats needed, three preferred dates and a daytime phone number. Their online page specifically states that if you do not receive a confirmation call, you do not have a reservation. Sorry teenyboppers, you must be 18 years old. The phone number for the Los Angeles studio show request line is (323) 575-4321.

I'm sure Dottie Haines would be proud.

-- Posted: Nov. 14, 1998